A Note to Trauma Survivors
A Note to Trauma Survivors...and those who wonder if what they have experienced might be called "trauma"...
Most people experience some trauma in their lifetime. Many would not call their experiences "trauma" or are even aware that they have had to survive unsafe and threatening circumstances or relationships in their life. Because the child knows nothing else, and what is happening is not being called trauma or abuse, children often do not think of their experience this way. This message is aimed at those who wonder if what they experienced as a child was actually "trauma". I would like to offer you some definitions in the field of Trauma and some explanations of how trauma is "remembered"---in many instances, there can lots of missing pieces or periods of time in a trauma survivors memory of their childhood. And what is remembered is not perceived as trauma because it was "normal".
So let's start at the beginning. What is trauma? While this word is thrown about and used to describe many experiences in current day, like a breakup of a relationship or or learning of a loved-one's diagnosis, it actually has a very specific definition in the research and clinical world. Trauma is defined at an overwhelming experience where a person perceived their life and safety to be threatened. This can include car accidents, combat trauma, natural disasters like hurricanes and floods, Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES) or experiences of assault and/or abuse.
Trauma can be a "single incident" (e.g. car accident) or an enduring circumstance occurring over time, such as a Domestic Violence Relationship. When trauma occurs in childhood over time, it is known as Developmental Trauma, because it impacts the child's brain development and can interrupt learning and feeling safe in relationships. If the trauma to the child occurs in the context of the Caretaker-Child Relationship, it is called Attachment Trauma. This type of trauma presents the child with a particularly painful, unsolvable dilemma--a child fears their caretaker and needs to maintain proximity to their caretaker to survive. The term "Complex Trauma" refers to trauma occurring in childhood over time, often (but not necessarily) inflicted by the child's caretaker.
Neuroscience as made great strides in the last 30 years in understanding what happens in the human brain when one is experiencing trauma. When perceived threat is involved, certain structures in the brain "turn off". This includes logical thinking, planning and reflecting on their experience, problem solving and encoding the experience into memory (all left-brain functions). Experiences where there is no perceived threat are encoded into the left brain as "narrative" or story-memories. Because important parts of the brain shut down (and essentially stop processing what is happening into a narrative memory), traumatic memory is encoded in the right brain as sensory experiences or flashes of visual memory.
These highly charged memories can be "triggered" by experiences in the present that are somehow similar to the original trauma, such as a similar sound, smell, image or words and tone. Individuals with a history of trauma can be triggered into "re-experiencing the trauma" where the experience/body-memory lights up in the Right Brain and feels as though it is happening right now. Right brain trauma memory has no sense of time or that what is being remembered is in the past. When triggered, one can have no awareness that what they are experiencing is a "memory" triggered by a current circumstance. After trauma, the brain remains "on guard" and vigilant (and therefore more prepared) for the next trauma. When one is having repeated triggered experiences, they experience "symptoms", not knowing that these are "body memories" of trauma. Some survivors fear they are "crazy" as the symptoms can arise suddenly and seemingly without a clear cause.
When seeking out therapy, it is essential that individuals who suspect they may have a history of trauma work with therapists who are specifically training in treating trauma. Trauma is not just a "bad experience" and should not be treated as something that needs to be shared and witnessed to be healed. Very often, talking about trauma makes one feel worse and triggers a "re-experiencing" of the trauma which does not bring on healing or relief.
Therapy for Trauma involves working with resources or tools for calming and soothing a person so that the client can feel more present. Some of these resources are already available to the person and some are taught and experiences. The hope is that the client will learn tools to regulate that they can employ whenever and wherever they are if they get triggered. Healing in trauma entails developing a relationship with the parts of oneself that have been denied and set apart. Developing compassion for one's younger self who survived brilliantly and adaptively is perhaps the most healing ingredient of all.
The experience of trauma survivors needs to be understood as the body and brain's response to overwhelming experience--especially because shame and self-blame are so often felt by survivors. This shame is compounded by our society's propensity to deny, hide, and turn away from the reality that these experiences occur far too often. Trauma survivors need to know that they are not alone and what is happening for them is not a "choice" but an automatic reaction formed in previous traumatic experiences.
